L is wearing what?
by Tree Flower
Summary: Chapter 21: The Fourth of July Special: Happy Birthday America! Includes magical speedos, double the America, and fireworks!
1. Magical?

Raito was sitting on a couch in one of Misa's friend's house. Misa had invited Raito and, surprisingly Ryuuzaki to a costume party her friend was having. Misa was dressed up as a witch, Raito was dressed up as...well he was just wearing black wings and a black halo that Misa gave him.

"You look like a fallen angel!" Misa squealed, adding a touch of make-up to his face.

"Yea, a hot fallen angel!" Her friend said, checking him out before being glared at by Misa.

Ryuuzaki was dressed up as...well Raito didn't know yet. The suger crazy detective didn't even arrive at the party yet. So Raito wondered about what sort of costume he would be in, maybe Sherlock Holmes or a piece of candy. Hell, maybe he would even dress up as Raito and call himself Kira. Then he would have to kill the bastard with his own two hands, death note or no death note. But that would be overreacting. At least it would get rid of the trouble of trying to find his damn name.

"Ryuuzaki-san, your here!" Misa announced.

Raito looked up and stared at the crazy detective. He had robes, a wooden stick in his hand, and a fake scar on his fore head.

"Why, I'm Harry Potter."

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What can I say? I did this really fast. 


	2. MisaMisaMisaMisa!

Misa was having a crappy morning. First off, there was no more toilet paper in the bathroom. Second, she wasn't able to have a date with Raito today because he was "too busy" working with Ryuuzaki.

"That damn pervert Ryuuzaki!" Misa screamed, walking around in her room. "How dare he keep my Raito-kun away from me!"

She opened the door to run right over to Ryuuzaki and attack him when she saw something on the floor. She picked it up and noticed it was an envelope adressed to her. Misa sniffed it and then hugged it close.

"It smells like Raito-kun!"

She ran over to her couch, sat down, and then opened the envelope.

_Misa,_

_Keep this at all costs no matter what until we need it._

_Raito_

Misa was confused at what he meant by 'keep it at all costs' until she took out the next thing in the envelope. At first, it looked like a photo of her, but looking closer it was Ryuuzaki himself, and by the looks of it, he raided her room when she was sleeping, and that he was drunk. He was even wearing a blonde wig, make up, and had fake boobs. Misa started laughing.

"HAHA Ryuuzaki is dressed up as me!" Misa noticed there was also a tape in the envelope so she put it in the VCR and pressed play.

_"What the hell are you wearing Ryuuzaki!?" _

_"Haha, look Raito-kuuuuun," Ryuuzaki's voice was slurred. "I'm Misamisa!"_

_Ryuuzaki was holding a bottle of not wine, but beer and he drank it all in one gulp._

_"But if Misamisa is MisaMisa...then I must be MisaMisaMisaMisa!!!!!!!!" _

_"Ryuuzaki...maybe you should stop drinking, you must be really drunk!"_

_Ryuuzaki, being the rebelious type, took out 2 bottles and drank them at the same time._

_"Ryuuzaki, I'm serious, stop drinking!"_

_"Raiito-kuuun, did I ever tell you that I-"_

The video stopped there.

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Well, I don't spell or grammar check so...


	3. Hoot hoot

_Raito was laughing while L fell down on the ground dying._

_"You win," L coughed out, "you win Ki--hoot hoot."_

_"What?" Raito asked, looking at L._

_"I said Yagami-san that you hoot hoot."_

Raito woke up from his almost perfect dream.

"Hoot hoot!"

"Damn owl," Raito said, getting out of his bed.

He walked to his window and looked out. There was this HUGE owl on a branch in a tree (obviously). It had big, huge, black eyes and it just stared at him.

"Hoot hoot," the owl said again.

"Stupid owl, shut up!" Raito yelled before throwing something at it and going back into his bed.

"Hoot hoo--OW!" The owl yelled.

Raito heard something snap, probably the branch, and heard the owl fall to the ground. Being sucessful in his attempt to shut up, possibly harm the owl, Raito was about to fall asleep again when he heard something.

"57.3 sure you're Kira."

Raito, once again wide awake, went back to his window and looked down. On the ground in an owl costume was none other than L himself.

"L, what the hell were you doing at my house at 3 in the morning and why are you in an owl costume!?"

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Thanks for all your reviews :)


	4. Saw it coming

Raito had seen it coming since Misa's party. Raito woke up that morning and opened his closet to find out that some of his clothes were missing. At first, he thought his mom had went into his closet when he was sleeping and donated a few to whatever she donates clothes to, but when he asked his mom about the missing clothes, she didn't know anything.

"Maybe you just misplaced them?" she had said, washing some dishes in the sink.

Raito went to where they investigated, and found out that L wasn't there yet. Matsuda was surprised to find this out 5 minutes later, and Raito was suspicous.

Raito tried to concentrate on the case, but his mind was too occupied on what L might be planning.

Matsuda suddenly asked out loud to no one in particular, "Where did my secret stash of sake go?"

'Uh oh,' Raito thought.

Just then, L almost quite litterally came crashing into the room from the door with a sake bottle in his hand.

"LOOK EVERYONE!" L shouted in a very out of character way. "I'M KIRA!"

"Ryuuzaki, what is the meaning of this? And is that Raito's clothes?"

"Hey! Thats my sake!"

Raito only stared in shock.


	5. The weird meeting, chocolate included

"Watari, do you know why Ryuuzaki keeps dressing up?" Soichiro asked.

The entire team (Misa included) were all in what was called "the meeting room."

Watari sighed. "I knew this was going to happen someday, but I didn't think it would be during one of Ryuuzaki's most important cases."

"Wait, you knew this was going to happen?" Raito asked, staring at Watari.

"Well, yes, but I thought it would be when he eats one sweet too much and gets sent to an insane asylum," Watari looked like he was going to be ready to go into story mode, and they all paid attention. "it all started out Ryuuzaki was a little not really normal but still 9 year old..."

_L, the cute loveable 9 year old, was curled up in a chair alone in his bedroom. He was at an orphanage for super smart people, and L was both sad, happy, and bored. He was sad because his parents died a year ago, happy because he had stolen a huge cake from the kichen, and was bored because he was bored. When L is bored, L does crazy things. Like steal a whole cake. _

_"Yummmm...delicous cake, be ready to be MINE!" L grabbed his trusty spoon and ate the extremely large cake (with no missing slices) in a couple of bites. _

_L had many strange habits. A few would be his sweets, staying up, paranoia, sitting. What everyone at the orphanage knew was his most weirdest habit._

"I have to go pee!" Everyone glared at not Matsuda, but Mogi who looked like he was going to explode.

"You always ruin everything Mogi!" No need to know who said that, as it was extremely obvious.

_L opened his secret closet (the closet behind the closet) and picked out a random outfit. Then he changed into it. Everyday, L would be seen wearing a costume out of nowhere, until Watari and another person you have no need to know started giving him pills until he forgot about his weirdness...I mean habit of changing into random costumes._

"If you gave him drugs to make him stop wearing costumes, why did he start doing it again?" Misa asked, trying to imagine a nine year old L.

"L walked into my room a few months ago and said that he was invited to a costume party and needed help on what he should wear, since he assumed he knew nothing about costumes," Watari started, "and then when I was about to say he couldn't go, he had this weird look in his eye. I tried to get him to take the pills cleverly covered to look like candy, but he suddenly ran off."

Raito twitched. This started because Misa invited Ryuuzaki to her damn party?

"I say lets take down Ryuuzaki and make him take the pills!" Matsuda suggested, wanting revenge for him taking his precious sake.

"Matsuda," Aizawa started, "thats a--"

He was interrupted by the locked doors suddenly opening revealing Ryuuzaki dressed up as a chocolate bar.

'A very sexy chocolate bar,' Raito's inner self said.

'What!? Who are you!?' Raito yelled, mentally of course.

'Why I am your... it paused for effect, 'inner you!'

'NOOOOOOOOO!'

Raito had also exclaimed this out load so everyone except the crazy lunatic chocolate bar stared at him.

"RAIIITTTOOO-KUUUN!" Ryuuzaki yelled. "YOU WILL BE MIIIIIIINE!" :D

So the semi-brain dead looking Raito was dragged away by Ryuuzaki while everyone stared.

A few minutes later Matsuda asked, "Why a chocolate bar? Why not a thong wearing--"

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I blame my mind. Now accepting suggestions. 


	6. Speedo & Bday suit!

Raito woke up tied to a chair. He noticed that he was wearing a dress.

'Hm...why am I here...' Raito thought for a moment before he remembered. 'Damn L. Now he's going to rape me and...oh crap...'

He tried to untie himself, but L had used handcuffs and wrapped the chain around his stomach. Raito started to panic.

'Where is that bastard anyway...'

L walked in.

Raito stared. 'oh my god...'

L hiccuped. "Heyy Raito, your so pretty...and your tied up to a chaiiiir, juuuust. foooor. meeeeeeeee!"

"L, you know this is illegal, and your the law!" Raito said, trying to get out of this very bad situation before something bad happened.

"The law?" L repeated, "The LAW? I AM ABOVE THE LAW!"

'That would explain...everything'

Raito then noticed that L was wearing a speedo. A very small tight speedo.

'He looks hot' Raito thought before killing that thought instantly. 'Eww, nasty thoughts...nasty thoughts!'

"Its time to play Raiiito-kuun!"

"OH GOD NO!!!!! SOMEONE HELP MEEE!"

A dart came outta nowhere and hit L in the neck. L didn't move a muscle. Ten more darts hit L in the neck and he fell onto the ground.

"Raito!"

"Raito-kun!"

Soichiro and Matsuda both shouted that out at the same time as they came from behind the tables in the room.

Watari picked up L from the ground as if he was just a feather and walked away to parts unknown. Okay, so Watari took L to his room to give him the pills and other stuff.

"Raito, are you okay?" Soichiro asked his only son, unlocking the handcuffs.

"Maybe physicly, but mentally..."

"Raito-kun, why are you wearing a dress?"

"Matsuda," Raito said, looking very serious and looking straight into Matsuda's eyes (not gay-like). "We. Will. Never. Talk. About. This. Again. In fact, this never happened."

"Wow, Raito-kun can be so scary sometimes," Matsuda scrached the back of his head.

"RAIITO-KUN!" A high-pitched voice screamed.

They all assumed it was Misa, but were they ever so wrong. It was L, and he was in his birthday suit. He had a crazy look in his face and he also had rope. Before anyone could react to this, like a cowboy L swung the rope around and lassoed Raito and started dragging him away...again.

"Well," Matsuda started, breaking the silence, "this is better than when I suggested he should've..."

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Thanks to my friend for picking the speedo against the swimming trunks!

L is running out of costumes (which is why he is in his birthday suit). Help him fill his closet up by sending me some ideas!

Love all,  
Treeflower :)


	7. Adam and Eve drunken style

Raito woke up tied to a bed wearing a wig and a leaf.

"What the hell...oh god..."

L walked into the room wearing nothing but a leaf. How he kept it there was a mystery to Raito.

"Hey Eve, ready to plaaay?"

'Oh god, why am I always the girl?' Raito thought before saying out loud, "Ryuuzaki, Adam and Eve didn't have sex, nor did Adam rape Eve or dress his friend up as her."

"..."

'Uhh...crap he's getting closer...' Raito then noticed that he was tied to the bed with long grass. '...I think alcohol destroys Ryuuzaki's sense of judgement...'

Raito broke free from the bed only to be tackled (or glomped) by L to the ground. L then started to make out with him.

'AHH GOD...oh...mmmmmm...'

They were like that for about 5 minutes before L needed some breath. He got off the ground and suddenly, his eyes glazed over before going back to its normal looking way.

"Uh...Yagami-kun...why are you on the floor with only a leaf?"

"...Uh..."

"Oh god...NOOO!!!" L fell on his knees.

They both were attacked by sleeping darts.

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Hey guys thanks for ALL your suggestions! I'll use almost all of them (except for the ones i dont know x3) 


	8. Stupid Cupid

The past week had been very tense. Raito and Ryuuzaki seemed to suffer from post-trauma memory loss, but Watari said that they might remember what had happened. While Raito and Ryuuzaki sit in their chairs researching, they seemed oblivious to the tension hanging in the air that the rest of the team has been generating. Note that "seemed" was the key word.

They DID notice the tension, in fact; if Raito had a knife, he would be able to cut a piece of it out of the air because it was so damn thick. Raito wanted to leave as fast as he (and Ryuuzaki's) body could run. He really did not like the fact that the team kept looking at not only him, but Ryuuzaki too, and he did not like how they thought he was not going to notice.

He rolled his chair right next to Ryuuzaki. The detective in question stopped working and looked up.

"Yes, what is it Yagami-kun?"

Raito, for reasons even he could not fathom, did not like how Ryuuzaki called him "Yagami-kun"

"Ryuuzaki, can we go outside and go somewhere?"

"I don't see a reason to leave, unless you are Kira and you're trying to stop me from solving this case…"

"No it's not because of that," Raito said, and noticing the look he got from him quickly added, "And I'm not Kira!"

"Then why, Yagami-kun," he paused for a moment to drink a bit of tea before continuing, "do you see the need to leave right as I'm in the middle of finding some very valuable info?"

They both knew that there is not any info, and there has not been any in a very, very long time.

"In case you haven't noticed," Raito went a bit closer so the rest of the team (who were trying to eavesdrop on them) could not hear. "Everyone seems to be…on an edge so to speak. In addition, their damn staring keeps bothering me. So maybe if we left for a little bit, maybe with Misa, that would lessen the tension so they can focus more on their work."

"Ah, I see now Raito-kun," Raito twitched at use of his first name. "We should go out for a bit, maybe bringing Misa, would lessen the tension so everyone can focus more on their work!"

Raito just nodded.

Just at that exact moment, Misa decided to barge in and yell at Ryuuzaki.

"RYUUZAKI IF YOU DON'T LET ME AND RAITO GO OUT ON A DATE THEN…"

"Ah Misa-chan, we were just talking about that!" Ryuuzaki exclaimed with his creepy smile he usually makes when he finds some incriminating info against Raito or if he was just being a…pervert.

"YAY! LET'S GO!" Misa grabbed Raito and Ryuuzaki's arms and started to drag them out.

The door slammed when they left. Raito's reasoning for leaving was so the tension would lessen a bit, but it just increased.

"OH MY GOD! WHAT IF THEY REMEMBER AND L STARTS TO RAPE RAITO-KUN!" Matsuda yelled out in panic.

Watari, who just came in unnoticed, sighed and took out his knockout gun and one knockout bullet. The rest of the team started to freak out. _Make that…a lot more bullets._

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While they were out, a very tiny plan started almost as fast as Ryuuzaki could kill it. Almost. It was a crazy plan, and Ryuuzaki did not like it. His intelligent side was telling him it was to childish and pointless, while the other voice, dubbed crazy child side, was telling him that THAT made Ryuuzaki was he was today: an intelligent, but crazy detective with a childish side. Reasonable, his well, reasonable side, was telling him it WAS reasonable, and the other half of him, the one he knew had existed since before he went to Whammy's was just DYING to come out and try the plan out.

Yes, Ryuuzaki was not stupid. He knew what had happened almost a week ago, and he had not lost his memory. Only because he did not have one in the first place. It was a crazy theory, but his theoretical side combined together with Reasonable has told him that he had a split personality. And his other side liked Raito.

So while they ate in a small café and talked about trivial things, the other him went fan boy in his mind.

'But wait a minute…' Ryuuzaki thought. 'If my "other half" so to speak likes Raito-kun so much, why would it go ahead with the plan?'

'Because' another side of his mind he has yet to name said 'it is too complicated for even a genius like you L would understand.'

'Oh.'

Ryuuzaki silently followed Raito and Misa back to the headquarters. The small incomplete plan in his head was slowly forming into a flawless SUPER PLAN.

'Common sense' cried in a corner with Intelligence's twin.

"Raito-kun," Ryuuzaki said, and Raito and Misa stopped walking.

"Yes, what is it Ryuuzaki?" Raito asked in a questioning tone.

"I think you should stay with Misa-cha for a little bit, I think you deserve the…_alone_ time."

"b-but, Ryuuzaki! What about the case?" Raito, as everyone except Misa knows, does NOT have any feelings for Misa at all.

"I think the team can handle it," Ryuuzaki said, giving his OTHER creepy smile, which sent shivers through Raito's body.

The BAD shivers. Raito recalls seeing that smile before, but he just cannot place where.

Ryuuzaki unlocked the handcuffs and watched as Misa dragged Raito faster than the speed of light. Haha. Light.

Ryuuzaki then slipped into spy mode and started crawling army style to his secret storage room. That is somewhat hard considering the fact that it is about five floors above the floor he was on right now. He crawled into the elevator at around the same time as Matsuda, who just stared at him as if he was crazy, which he probably really is.

"Matsuda-san, can you press the button for floor 7?"

The elevator music started playing, with L on the floor and Matsuda sending him worried glances every couple of seconds. They arrived at floor 7 and Ryuuzaki crawled out.

"….I really need to double that therapy if I need to forget this moment," Matsuda said to himself, half in horror and half in shock.

Ryuuzaki continued down the long hallway until he reached a lonely door, which he then did a forward summersault and stood up. He brushed himself of the dirt he collected, and then unlocked the door.

'Holy heaven!' The child L said in his mind.

Ryuuzaki let the child L take control over his whole body. He started to walk down the long closet.

'Rope…wings…bow….arrow…make that more arrows….arrow bucket thingy…sandals….tunic…..make up…'

'BWHAHAHA this will be the coolest thing ever!' L said, and even Ryuuzaki had to agree to his insane half.

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Raito was bored out of his mind (though we already knew he WAS out of his mind). Misa was all BLABLABLAthisBLABLALBAthat. It was just, boring.

"…and then Kaoru-chan was like 'Hibari-chan you don't need a man who looks like he's a vampire'! And then Hibari was like 'he's cute, and at least I HAVE a man!'"

'Damn it Misa, no one cares if Kaoru is jealous of Hibari!' Raito thought internally but said aloud, "What do you think of this situation?"

"I don't really care because Misa Misa has Raito-kun!" Misa exclaimed and grabbed onto Raito's arm.

'Ugh…Ryuuzaki had better come back soon…'

While these two had a…moment, L was currently hanging from the ceiling using the rope. He was having some trouble with the bow and arrow, but then got it right.

"Cupid's arrow shows true love!!!" L exclaimed and shot the first arrow…at Misa's butt.

The "couple" was confused at first, but that quickly changed when the arrow hit Misa.

"AH! RYUUZAKI YOU PERVERT!"

The next arrow, a suction cup-tipped arrow, hit and got stuck on Raito's forehead.

Misa's angry face changed into a super-hyper-happy-active face.

"EEK! RYUUZAKI-KUN REALIZES MISAMISA'S TRUE LOVE FOR RAITO AND DRESSED UP AS CUPID TO GIVE US HIS BLESSINGS OF A LUCKY FUTURE!!! THAT'S SOO CUTE AND SWEEET!" Misa yelled and started to make out with Raito.

'Ku ku ku, soon Raito-kun, soon…' L had his creepy smile again and slowly went back into the ceiling, just like a spider.

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**A/N: Haha. After like a bajillion years I have come back...to steal your candied apples! Hyuk hyuk hyuk! Anyways...like it? I WILL update...but in the case I dont by next week...theres always giving me presents! and especually on Nov 7! (haha b-day :D)**

**Next Chapter: Ninja? no. Spy!**


	9. Super SPY! and CAKE!

Ryuuzaki practically felt the killing intent (Haha naruto) rolling off Raito-kun. Raito was not very happy about the fact that Misa made out with him for 5 minutes (Raito almost passed out from lack of air). Damn could Misa hold her breath. Maybe she could breathe through her big butt or something.

Ryuuzaki was listening to music. Usually he listens to classical music only when he was doing cases, but it had been so long since he had listened to anything other than classical. So he went through the **gigantic** music list. After he looked at the 1000th song, he decided it was a waste of time and just pressed the "play all" button. So right now he was listening to the Spiderman theme song.

'Spiderman, Spiderman…' Ryuuzaki hummed, getting a glance from Raito.

He took a sip from his sweetened tea when a new song came on.

An emotion shined in his eye that hasn't shined ever since…ever! In reality, it hasn't shined since Matsuda gave him that CD of songs that Matsuda had actually remixed himself and given to Ryuuzaki a few days ago (and he even created a theme song for L and remixed it a couple of times!). The other side of L did a freaky fan girl scream and his new love switched from Raito to Matsuda.

'Greatest idea ever L!'

'Yea, even Ryuuzaki helped!'

'Yay!'

Various "personalities" in his mind were talking all at once and he turned the music up a little bit so they would shut up.

The song that was currently playing was one of the songs on the CD Matsuda gave him.

Ryuuzaki stopped the song, stood up, and handcuffed Raito to the desk silently. Everyone gave him a questioning look.

"Minna," Ryuuzaki said. "Everyone, I do feel its time for us to do…a runathon!"

"What?"

"Huh?"

"Ryuuzaki-san, but I suck at running!"

Everyone had the same expressions, except Matsuda who just said he sucked.

"Whoever wins gets a Halloween bonus!"

Everyone never realized, but it WAS Halloween.

"From here all the way to the rooftop, GO!"

Everyone (except Ryuuzaki and Raito) immediately started running. The poor saps.

"Ryuuzaki, what the hell are you doing?"

"Oh…nothing." Creepy smile number 2 (the one that gives Raito nightmares) appeared on L's face.

L ran ninja style (AKA the way ninjas in Naruto run: with their arms behind their backs or whatever) to his magical closet full of his costumes.

"FOUND IT NEECHAN!" L shouted mentally to Ryuuzaki. He winced.

L got a "gun" out and leaned outside the window. He aimed the gun at the window a few stories above him that was open and shot. It was a grappling hook gun and it shot the hook all the way into the window. L pulled tight to make sure it was secure before climbing out the window and scaling the wall.

(Cue JAMES BOND Music)

Aizawa was hanging out next to the window. He was taking a little break and taking a breath of fresh air. Suddenly, a hook came through the window and stayed there. He just stared at it until L: climbed into the window dressed up as James Bond.

"Ryuuzaki, what are you doing?"

"Getting to the target, and the names Bond. James Bond," L replied before prepping the grappling gun and he jumped out the window while shooting the hook at the same time. The hook almost didn't hook onto the ledge. "Well, as they say in Japan, ja ne, Aizawa-san!" He started to scale the wall again.

Aizawa started to walk slowly to the top of the building, wondering if Matsuda got there already.

**

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**

Matsuda sighed. He had been on the rooftop for a while now, and he didn't even lose his breath trying to get here. It was a nice thing called an elevator, and years of being on his middle and high school cross-country team. He called himself slow because he considered himself slow. Silly Matsuda.

Matsuda suddenly heard someone humming the James Bond theme song and wondered if it was Aizawa; he was always into spy movies. Though he was surprised to see L climb up from the side of the building.

"Ryuuzaki-san!" Matsuda said in a surprised voice. "What are you doing here….and why are you wearing James Bond clothes?"

He shrugged. "Maybe I wanted to be a spy…and he's like a detective so…"

Matsuda thought that L sounded a bit…younger than he probably really was.

"By the way Matsuda-san," L started, looking at him with his big owl-like eyes.

"What is it Ryuuzaki?"

"How did you get here so fast?"

"Its this really great invention, its called the elevator and it can take you as high as it can go without having to climb so many stairs,"

Ryuuzaki blinked. He never expected something like that from Matsuda; the man was full of surprises.

L found himself walking to closer to Matsuda and…

Everyone else was really tired trying to get to the top. They weren't smart enough to use the elevator, and they were very tired. Being old does that to you. One thing they didn't expect was to see Matsuda and Ryuuzaki….making out.

**

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"Um…hello?" Raito yelled out. "Anyone there? I'm still handcuffed to the damn desk you know!"

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**AN: Like it? Yes, I suppose L x Matsuda! Believe it! By the way, when I use L instead of Ryuuzaki, it means that it is the "child-like" side of him. Ryuuzaki is the current L in the anime/manga that we all love. Only problem is its hard for me to you know…get them in exact character.**

**But anyway…**

**Here's an omake in honor of L's Birthday (and Halloween…I guess)**

AND HAPPY HALLOWEEN

**OMAKE: CAKE-A-LICOUS**

The team (minus Matsuda and Ryuuzaki) where in the investigation room doing whatever the hell they usually do. Ryuuzaki came into the room, in what some people would call the "emo-mode."

It could be felt by everyone in the room as he practically OOZED emo.

"Are you okay Ryuuzaki?" Raito was the bravest to ask, and the loser of a silent staring contest with everyone else in the room.

"Actually, now that you ask Raito-kun," Raito twitched at the use of Kun. "I do feel rather down today."

"Why is that?"

"Aren't you the nosey type?"

"Just answer the damn question."

"Well, today is the birthday."

Everyone stared. His birthday was on Halloween of all days?

"What's so bad about that?"

"I wanted to capture Kira before then but…"

Watari came in carrying a HUGE box.

"Ryuuzaki, Matsuda wanted me to bring this in here and open it…" Watari said.

Ryuuzaki nodded and Watari opened it to reveal…

"HOLY ROTTEN SUSHI!" Soichiro exclaimed, earning weird looks from everyone.

It was a gigantic cake with the words "Happy Birthday L" in big, black frosting.

Ryuuzaki stared with his big, very emotional and happy eyes. He brought his finger to sample a tiny bit of the frosting, and his face went through a series of emotions. His eyes were practically watering.

"Matsuda is so nice! He knew when my birthday was and -sniff- knew what flavor cake I love!"

Matsuda came in wearing--you guessed it-- a cake hat. Not what you were guessing?

"Happy birthday L! I would've gotten you a cake costume but the store ran out of them and…"

Ryuuzaki tackle hugged him.

"GREATEST PRESENT EVER!!!!!"

Matsuda blushed and seemed a little big embarrassed. They got up off the floor. Matsuda put the hat on L's head and shouted, "PARTY!" while taking out a HUGE box full of sake.

You could just SEE what's going to happen.


	10. MisaMisa likes Strawberry Bunnies

You know...I **WAS** gonna put up a valentines chap...but completely forgot and made this. Oh well. Oh yea, and...here's a small key to keep up with those crazy personalities. Haha. Even I can't keep up with them, and I made them!

_"Konnichi wa. I am L."_

**_"Fool. I am the sensible smart original..." _**-gets cut off-

'Ryuuzaki.'

* * *

They had done what will be forever known as the infamous "MatsuL Breakup." They had both, meaning Matsuda and L, tried to forget they had even DONE anything together. Which is hard, considering that half the closets had to be remodeled, and Mogi will forever be scarred by what he saw. Let's not forget: they work in the same room.

L, and poor Raito being the poor guy handcuffed to a lunatic, were both locked up in the bedroom doing the research in there. Raito's dad totally disapproved, and thinking of the MatsuL Breakup, demanded that they work with everyone else, or at least not in a bedroom.

Of course, being the silly stubborn defective detective locked himself, and Raito, in the bedroom.

Raito got enough of this. In the middle of L's mental rambling and arguments, Raito finally said something.

"_I say we knock Matsuda out and…"_

"Ryuuzaki."

L, erm…Ryuuzaki looked up from his laptop and looked at Raito.

"Yes Yagami-kun?"

"This is ridiculous!"

"What is ridiculous?"

"You and your stupid breakup!"

"Breakup with whom?"

"With Matsuda!!"

"…I never was with…."

"SHUT UP and stop pretending you never were with him! This is silly! Just work in the same room with him, and FORGET about it!" Light then went into a long monologue that he had probably prepared beforehand.

L tuned out and went back to his mental arguing.

"_Anyway, as I was saying….we knock out…"_

"_**Baka. He is right you know."**_

'…can't we just go back to our regular plan?'

"_**Fools, all of you."**_

"_Says the fool in the cage."_

"_**I will get out. Then everything will be back to normal."**_

"…Ryuuzaki are you even listening to me?!"

"Huh?" L said unintelligently.

"Anyway…"

There was a large banging on the door.

"HEY! LET MISA IN!"

Ryuuzaki's eye lit up.

His mind groaned while he got up and opened the door. A blonde projectile flew from the door and latched itself onto Raito.

"Ne, Raiiiito-kun!" Misa said happily. "Let's go on a D-A-T-E!"

"But, Misa, I have work to do and the case…"

"That is a great idea Misa-san," Ryuuzaki agreed, and Raito face palmed.

"Now don't use this as an excuse to get away from your Matsuda problems." Raito said to Ryuuzaki when they arrived at the café.

"What?"

"Why are you wearing bunny ears?"

"Ne, Raito-kun, don't forget his cute bunny tail!" Misa happily added.

Raito groaned, not knowing that those random split personalities also groaned.

Ryuuzaki surprisingly got many…looks. The good kind. The kind Raito usually gets when he's walking around flashing that cute smile around. Yup.

Misa was surprising a little jealous. She reassured herself that she had Raito-kun and has no need for freaks with bunny ears. Rich freaks. With cool black rings around their eyes. With cool hair. With…oh what the heck.

Misa quickly buried herself in a strawberry sundae, which L was eyeing from his strawberry cake. Raito sighed, drinking his coffee.

Misa was about to eat that delicious looking strawberry when it disappeared. She quickly looked at L, who had just put the strawberry in his mouth. His bunny ear twitched. She leaned forward and…

Raito will forever remember this as the infamous "MisaL get together".

Or, as Misa said:

"Misa-Misa likes strawberry bunnies!"


	11. Giant Lemon

**Here you go! FINALLY something thats not part of the silly mini "story within a story."  
AKA back to the one shot series...for now.**

* * *

Light yawned. Classes were done for the day, and all he wanted to do was have a nice relaxing evening with his food, his chips, and his Death Note. He walked out of the building and onto the campus, taking the path he always takes to go home.

"Eek! Hana! There's a giant lemon walking around campus! Don't go that way!"

Light stopped walking. Lemon?

"A giant lemon? Where I wanna see!"

"Excuse me lady's," Light walked up to them.

"Oh, Light-sempai what is it?"

"What did this giant lemon look like?"

"Oh, it was a lemon, but giant! It had white sleeves, and the guy had black hair and bags and everything!" she replied. "But, why do you need to know Light-sempai?"

Oh gods. Light sure hoped it wasn't who he thought it was.

"Oh, there's no reason, but where did you see this giant lemon?"

"Oh if you just go this way..." She pointed him the way.

Light walked over that way.

"Jeez, as if he would really...but then again he does sit funny...but he _is_ a genius...supposedly..."

"OH, Light-kun!"

Light turned around. It was freaking Ryuuga, and he was dressed up as a giant lemon. His funny face was recognizable anywhere.

"That creep knows Light?"

"Isn't that Ryuuga Hideki, the guy who scored 100 with Light?"

"I always knew geniuses were weird...but you'd have to be crazy to wear _that!_"

Light heard the whispers of the people on the campus.

"What the hell are you doing Ryuuga?" Light whispered furiously.

"Looking for you."

Light heard more whispering.

"You see, I have something to confess to you."

Light may have looked calm on the outside, but inside he was freaking out, and annoyed. The annoyed part was starting to show on his face.

"...well what is it?" Light asked. "Spit it out!"

"wait...he's going to confess something?"

"Ha ha! He's a lemon...and their both guys! Imagine the details!"

Light mentally groaned at what he just heard.

"Light-kun..."

Everyone leaned forward.

"...I..."

Everyone took out their cellphones and had started to record this.

"...am..."

"Stop stalling and say it already!" Light said, although he was mentally worrying about what was going to happen...

"...working at a lemon cart and wanted to bring some lemonade for you!"

Everyone, except Light, fell to the ground anime style. Light only sighed and said, "Why me?"


	12. Jello Pelted

**WOW. More updates!**

Light was walking to his next class. It was a rainy day, and once again Ryuuga wasn't there.

"Probably working on the Kira case," Light thought to himself.

He sat down and looked around. It was a lecture style classroom, like most of the classrooms there.

"Psst is that Yagami Light..." people were whispering about him. It wasn't new, but the whispering seemed to _not_ be about how good he looked.

The group of girls (and a couple guys) seemed to grow a little bit bigger before the professor went into the classroom and they all took their seats.

"Today we are..."

Light was bored.

"Psst Yagami-san" someone next to him whispered.

"Yes?"

"Ano...are you expecting anything today?"

"No why?"

"Are you doing anything?"

"...no."

The girl went back to whispering to someone else.

Light ignored that and went back to being bored.

_"I can't wait to get back home and start killing some more criminals..."_ he idly thought.

"Oi, Light-o" It was Ryuk, the worlds most annoying shinigami.

Light ignored it..erm him.

"Hey Liight-o theres a blob of something coming into the classroom," Ryuk shouted from across the room. His head was in the wall.

Light blinked.

"Whoa, it smells good! I wonder if its an apple..." Ryuk pondered.

Apples. Ryuk is crazy.

The door was slammed open. The professor and everyone stopped whatever the heck they were doing (including the two people making out in the corner) to look at the door.

"Gomen." the...red colored blob thing said. "Sorry I'm late."

"WHOA!" someone yelled from somewhere. "ITS A JELLO BLOB!! -insert eye hearts here-"

"ugh.." two people tied the person down.

"NO! ITS RYUGA HIDEKI!" someone else yelled.

"Oh god," Light said, hitting his head on the table.

"Oh, Light-o-kun!" Ryuga waved to Light.

'Why does everyone call me Light-o?' Light thought mentally before saying out loud, "What the hell are you covered in?"

"Well...I was walking past this jello stand when suddenly the owner yelled 'HIT THE DECK!' Of course, I didn't react fast enough as I liked and I got covered in strawberry flavored jello. (Ryuk sniffled in the corner.) I shrugged and continued on my way to school when suddenly I got pelted by more jello from some passerby teenagers who thought it would be more funny if I had more jello on me. It was apple flavored."

"OH. MY. GOD! APPLES!" Ryuk freaked out and had an apple seizure.

"Then it started to rain and made the jello all soggy. But when I went into the buildings, the heater made them all jello-y and yummy." To prove the fact, he took a glob of jello and shoved it in his mouth. "Mmm...jello."

"JELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOO!" The jello-fanatic-obsessed-crazy-insane jello freak somehow got out of the ropes and jumped Ryuga.

Light quietly snuck out the classroom.


	13. Chicken Man

**

* * *

I'm on a roll huh? Keep sending those ideas!**

* * *

More University troubles.

Light was starting to get really pissed off. He usually didn't care about his social status, but this was getting ridiculous. Freaking Ryuga was really being retarded; he didn't even know why the supposedly smart detective kept dressing up in stupid (not to mention embarrassing) outfits.

Light walked past another whispering and giggling group of guys while he walked home. He was with his stupid, but still smarter than Misa, girlfriend Tadaka. Or was it Takada? Oh well, Light didn't remember, or cared enough to remember.

"So then Yuri was like 'You're with that freak, Light?' and Jenni was like 'He is hot, but he has a freak for a friend! That must mean he's a freak!' and I was like, 'Oh no you didn't!' and I bytch slapped that gurl!" Tadaka said, and the wrong spellings did mean she actually pronounced it like that.

Light sighed. Maybe Takada wasn't very smart.

He noticed something yellow on a bench. It wasn't...yes it was.

"Oi, is that a chicken?" Tadaka asked, and pointed at it. He wished it was just a chicken though.

"OH LIGHT-O-KUN!" The Chicken Man waved, looking up from his book. "Konnichi wa." He finished in a dull voice.

"Oh...Takada, this is my..._friend..._Ryuga." Light introduced, stressing the word friend.

"Konnichi wa!" Tadaka bowed.

"Hey, I remembered I had to do something with him...can we meet tomorrow?" Light asked.

"Of course! Bye Light...bye _Ryuga_," she winked at Ryuga in what Light tried to interpret as an attempt to seduce Ryuga.

What a wh...sl...that word.

"Why the hell are you dressed up as a chicken?" Light asked. Ryuga opened his mouth but Light stopped him. "AND DON'T say its because you're working somewhere! I'm sure you solve enough cases to feed Africa!"

"Do you really want to know the reason Light-kun?"

"YES. I. DO." Light had finally lost his cool.

"It's because I...Li-ike..."

"LIIIIIGHTOOOO-KUUUN!" It was Misa.

Damn. She interrupted.


	14. Ryuk and Apples

L was such a chicken...he didn't say anything...L sighed.

"...hm..."

Light was bored. Ryuk kept freaking bothering him about apples, his sister wanted apples, and his mom wanted him to go buy some apples.

"Welcome. Buy your apples here...now."

That voice..so familiar...of course Light knew who it was.

"Oi, Ryuuga." Light greeted, walking up to where Ryuuga was.

"Light-kun," Ryuuga said.

Ryuuga was dressed in a apple suit. Ryuk twitched.

Oh god. Light mentally spasmed. If Ryuuga was dressed in an apple, and Ryuk wanted to eat an apple...

He remembered the time Ryuk once confided in Light, and said that he dreamed (if shinigami can dream) to see and eat a giant apple.

Light quickly bought some apples. Well, more like half a years worth of apples (a week worth's of apple for Ryuk) and was about to leave when Ryuuga grabbed his arm.

"Wait, Raito-kun."

Light blinked and looked at Ryuuga. Ryuk was trying really hard not to do anything, knowing mentally that it was a ningen, and tried to look at the supply of new, red, shiny apples.

"Yea, what it is Ryuuga?" Light said, knowing that Ryuk was going to loose control soon if he didn't leave. Actually, thinking about it...if L was killed by a random invisible thing...

"I have something to tell you."

Yea...Light thought...just like the other one million times you said that.

"Really?"

"Yes Lighto-kun."

Ryuk spasmed.

"I...erm...this is hard for me to say."

"Can you hurry, I have to get home." Light said, slightly looking at Ryuk. He had about...erm...he didn't know.

"well..I..."

"Ryuk...must..."

"um..."

"REHYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!" Ryuk had a small seizure. "I CAN'T HELP IT!"

Ryuk jumped on L and started knawing on his costume.

"AHHH RAITO-KUUUN HELP ME!"

Light walked away.


	15. Sunscreen

**Quack? In honor of the beginning of summer vacation (or w/e it is to you guys) I present to you this chapter.**

* * *

"Phew, it's really hot," Light said and wiped the sweat off his forehead. A couple drops flew from his hands and fan girls dove just for the sweat to touch them.

It was a normal hot summer day in Japan, with the sun shining, the (annoying) birds chirping, and everyone was happy, even if it was really hot. Light knew what this meant. He walked through dark alleyways, through strip clubs, bad areas of town, behind buildings, even by the corner trying to avoid the inevitable.

"I guess he won't come today." Light said, and remembered he was supposed to meet them at the hotel room. Damn it.

"So, Light-o," Ryuk said, flying behind Light. "What are you going to do..." he trailed off.

"What is it Ryuk...?" Light asked, wondering why he trailed off.

"Moshimoshi Light-o-kun."

Damn it. "I guess I spoke to soon..."

"What was that Light-o-Kira-kun?"

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"...why are you wearing...what are you suppose to be anyway?"

"I'm a bottle of sunscreen."

Light stared.

"You know you need me, and you can squeeze me to get all the cream you need to have fun in the sun."

Light walked away.

"Wait, Light-o-kun, I still need to tell you how long it takes before you need to get more sunscreen on...!"


	16. Pandachan

An incident happened in Japan's Zoo a long time ago, and Light had most probably forgotten this moment, at least until he almost had a heart attack when he first saw L. No one ever talks about the Zoo Incident. Ever. It wasn't even scarring, or even remotely scary. But, it is to the eye of the beholder.

A nine year old Light and his class went to the zoo for a fieldtrip. Light-chan was bored.

"Okay class!" The hyperactive teacher said happily. "I want all of you to stay together, and NO wandering off."

Of course, half the boys wandered off while they walked around the zoo. Not Light-chan of course!

"Oh my, there seems to be a commotion at the panda bear section!"

Light blinked. There really was something happening where the panda bear cage was. And... Was that his dad?

The little kids immediately ran towards the cage, mostly the girls, wanting to see the cute panda bears and their cute little babies.

"Tou-san," Light said, slightly pulling on his dad's sleeve.

"Huh, Light, what are you doing here?"

"...my fieldtrip tou-san."

"It was today?"

"..."

"Erm...yes, but anyway there seems to be a teenager in the panda bear area with what seems like drugs."

Light went closer to the cage.

"Light, don't..!"

There was a guy sitting in a weird position on his high perch...err...really big rock. Not just that, but he was dressed up in a panda suit (thus making Light re-evaluate all the pandas to make sure he wasn't actually looking at a real one), and was holding...

"Tou-san, that's candy. A lot of candy." Light said, wondering why everyone has to assume that people who look like druggies have to have drugs. This was one-hundred percent true.

"Oh, want some candy?" Panda-san (as Light was going to call the guy) asked, offering one of his lollipops to Light.

"No thank you, Panda-san," Light politely declined, because you have to be nice to strangers, even if they are creepy looking and/or wearing a panda suit.

Panda-san didn't seem to care of the name Light-chan gave him, and just continued to eat his candy. The other panda's seemed to like him, and didn't mind he was in their area.

"YOU ARE VIOLATING THE RULES AND YOU MUST GET OUT OF THE CAGE, NOW." Light-Chan's dad shouted on his megaphone that all chief of police seem to get.

"Hey you big meanie!" Some little girl shouted. "He's not bothering the panda!"

"But he's breaking the rules!" some little boy said.

"But you always break the rules, so it doesn't matter!"

Light didn't notice he was standing in front of the cage door, or that it was open, or that Panda-san actually jumped off the rock and went over to where Light-chan was.

"Your sooo kawaii close up!" Panda-chan...Wait when did he upgrade to chan?

So he hugged Light-chan. Everyone froze and stared. Panda-chan (why is he still chan!?) and hugging Light and was also petting the top of his head. Light did the only thing he felt like doing, something no one expected.

He started to _cry_. His parents never hug him like that, not since he was 3. :(

"Tell me what makes you so sad," Panda-chan said, while still holding the poor crying boy.

-Sniff- "When I was 5, it was my birthday...-sniff- and NO ONE REMEMBERED!"

So, Light-chan told Panda-chan everything, while he listened and comforted Light-chan. Meanwhile, Light's dad passed out from shock, and everyone stared at the cute display going 'awww'.

* * *

**So Panda-chan is the reason Light isn't as crazy as he is suppose to be until the very end o,o;**


	17. Drumstick

**AU...but isn't it always AU anyway?**

* * *

It was a cold January day, and Light was walking home. It was getting dark, and the streets he was walking on were void of people. How odd.

"Chicken wings, drum sticks, and breasts here at Near's Chicken Emporium!" A voice called out to the empty streets.

Light blinked as a chicken restaurant suddenly appeared as he continued to walk. What surprised him was seeing a giant walking drum stick. Was it...steaming hot?

"Ah, good evening, valued customer," the drumstick talked to him. It turned around, to reveal it was actually a guy in a drumstick suit. "Would you like to buy some chicken?"

This guy, with black hair, and very light black rings around his eyes, stared at him with an almost empty look in his eyes. How creepy.

"No thanks," Light shrugged the offer away. "I have to get home."

"You sure? You could buy some chicken for your family," the guy's suit really was steaming, and Light knew it wasn't just some sort of eye trick.

"No really, its okay," Light tried to walk away, but the guy was blocking his way. Light would've walked around, but the suit helped the man with his small goal, and was the street always that busy?

"You could buy our special drumstick pack!" He said suddenly, and then pointed at himself. "You can bite into me, a delicious hot, steamy, juicy piece of chicken, as the juice drips down while you chew and swallow..."

Light twitched, and then froze. Did he just say bite into...?

"Did I mention our special sauce? You can put some on your chicken, and chew and lick it all off..."

Talk about out of character. There was some blond guy taking pictures of the guy in the suit, _giggling _while the white haired kid sat in front of the cash register, playing with his hair and watching them with amusement. The drumstick smiled at him.

His family was surprised when he came home later with a bag full of fried chicken.


	18. fail Potato Chips

**Pt.II of chicken. Sort of.**

* * *

Light ended up eating at Near's Chicken Emporium everyday for lunch. Damn drumstick. He came in the day after that first confrontation, to receive smirks from the white haired kid and the blond guy, and an almost knowing smile from the crazy drumstick.

"Ah, valued customer, welcome back. I see you like our chicken."

That crazy guy makes drumsticks look emo. A strange picture of a bleeding drumstick on the floor with a knife lying a couple centimeters away suddenly flashed in Light's mind. He shook his head to get rid of the thought before saying, "You can't keep calling me 'valued customer' forever. I'm Light Yagami."

The white haired kid had a thoughtful face, while the drumstick simply nodded his head (it was a comical site because of the suit) and before he could reply, the blond guy started laughing.

"Your last name is Yagami?!"

"...I don't see what's so funny about that." Light said, frowning.

The guy simply shook his head and continued to laugh.

"Ignore him, his name is Mello, he works in the chocolate store down the street," The drumstick said, cutting through Mello's laughs. "That quiet kid at the cash register is Near, and I'm Ryuuzaki."

--

Light came in for lunch one day, and noticed the absence of the drumstick...err...Ryuuzaki.

Buying some chicken, Light asked, "Where did Ryuuzaki go?" Ryuuzaki was always there whenever Light came over for lunch, so it was unusual for him to not be there.

"His other job."

Before Light could ask what it was, a giant bag of potato chips walked in.

"Oh, Light-kun!" the bag waved. "Hello."

"..." Light had no words. No words at all.

"Do you need change or something, I guess you can reach into my 'bag' and if you move your hand around enough, some 'chips' could come out. But, seeing as this is a new type of costume, liquid might accidentally come out and..."

Light only stared. What kind of weird joke was that?

"Or..._'will you take a potato chip...and _EAT it?'"

Mello laughed.

* * *

**Yeah...pretty lame stuff huh. I failed on this one. Sort of wrote this on a whim. Expect a rewrite...a lot later.**

**Also...so many reviews o-o; Much more then I would've gotten say...two months ago... Even if most of the reviews came from one person.**

**Arigato? **


	19. Mushroom Head

Light, a wannabe Asian gangster hanging out in a dark alleyway, was humming Euphoric Field, when some guy, who was walking on the sidewalk, stopped and looked at Light.

"What? You wanna be shanked, fool?" Light said, considering the fact no one in Japan would probably never, ever say that. Ever.

"Do not be silly young kid," the man said, before walking closer.

Light backed away and took out a small tiny dagger his "leader" gave him.

"_You'll need it eventually, rookie,"_ the young looking black haired leader of the gang he was a part of told him, before he left to go stalk some other guy with long black hair and glasses.

"I know what you need kid, and that's your daily fix of....shrooms!" The crazy guy said, taking a couple of the life giving plant out of his pocket.

"Is that why you have a mushroom hat....and also dressed like a mushroom, err.... Foo'," Light asked, further examining the shrooms.

"Come on kid, first one on me,"

So Light went and sniffed/ate/however you take shrooms and saw colors.

"You know...you're looking awfully hot in those mushroom clothes..."

So druggie-wannabe gangster Light tackled the other druggie mushroom and ravished him in the dark alleyway.

At least until Light woke up from that "horrible" dream.

"A nightmare Light-kun?" L asked, looking at Light from across the bed. "Perhaps about Kira?"

"....oh god." Light almost screamed, but then composed himself.

"Is something the matter Lighto-kun?"

"Why the hell do you have a mushroom hat on?"

* * *

100 Reviews! That makes me happy! Keep them coming folks!

Also started to upload this onto Deviantart so don't worry about copyright infringement!


	20. Birthday

L was feeling rather down today.

"What's wrong L?" Watari asked, standing next to L as he lay on the ground of...wherever they are.

"Don't you know Whammy?" B was getting his daily fix of strawberry jab stolen from the human world. "It's the great L's birthday!"

"It has been seven years since my death, and Light-kun is still Kira," L said, nibbling on his thumb.

"I bet your silly heirs will get them!" B said, and then their....portal thing that they use to look down at the human world turned into a dual image of both Near and Mello, one surrounded by blocks, the other nibbling on a chocolate bar.

"I do believe they will," L said. "But I wonder if they can do it separated instead of working together..."

"If you believe they will, just drop it!" B accidentally dropped a small glob of jelly on L's face.

"So why are you here B?" Watari asked, wondering why the crazy boy was here in the first place.

"Oh yeah!" B licked the rest of the jelly off his fingers and put the jar of jelly down. "Now I remember why I came over!" He took out something. "Put this on L!"

"A pair of angel wings?"

"Yeah! It's also Halloween back down on Earth, so you should put these on L-kun!" B moved the wings right next to L.

"How did you get these?"

"Gambling. Could you believe those guys had a pair of these wings? Makes you wonder if they do anything other than gamble!"

L didn't move, so B actually went through the trouble of putting the wings on L by himself.

"There we go, our very own, dare I say it, fallen angel."

"Wearing angel wings in the Shinigami world, how very ironic, B."

Watari was long gone by now, so L and B were all alone now, both looking down at the human world, one with angel wings, the other with a jar of strawberry jam, but if there was one thing they had in common besides well, their entire look was that they both had red eyes.

* * *

Because you all love L and B as shinigami ;)


	21. Fourth of July Special!

**It's been a while fellow readers. It's okay if you don't get the references, but if you do leave a review (and also point out where the references come from), you get some AMERICAN hamburgers. Don't forget to leave costume ideas in the reviews. Enjoy my 4 in one special! **

**(Get it? There's 4 and it's the fourth of July?)**

**-Is shot-**

* * *

The Happy Birthday America Special.

----

1.

Light sighed. He knew something was wrong when L decided after weeks and weeks of a standstill in the investigation that he decided to take Light, Misa, AND Matsuda somewhere. Without telling them anything, he told them all to pack their belongings and drove (yes, he actually DROVE) them to the airport, where they were now on an airplane to...somewhere.

Light sighed again.

"What's wrong Light-kun?" Matsuda said from Light's left. "Ryuuzaki-san has finally let us on a vacation!"

The fact that they're going on a _vacation_ of all things is wrong and not to mention weird. Their seating arrangement is also weird. Misa sat on Light's right, Matsuda on his left, and Ryuuzaki was sitting next to Matsuda. To make things awkward, they still had the handcuffs on (no need to think HOW they got on the airplane with THOSE on), so the chain was going over Matsuda. Light wondered why Ryuuzaki didn't just sit next to him so the chain wouldn't bother anyone, but then decided not to ask because he didn't want to sit next to the weirdo on this flight, which he didn't know how long it was.

"Thank you for boarding this flight to Florida. We hope you enjoy your flight."

Did they just say...?

"Ryuuzaki!" Light whispered in an angry tone. He was leaning towards Ryuuzaki.

"Yes Lighto-kun?" Great. The usage of first name.

"Why are we going to America, and why didn't you tell us?!"

"I thought it would be a pleasant surprise for all of you,"

"Are you crazy?! What about Kira?"

"What about Kira?"

"Shouldn't we be say, I don't know, LOOKING for him?"

They continued bickering at each other for a couple more minutes. They were both leaning in, making Matsuda, the man in between these two, uncomfortable.

This was going to be one long flight.

Some amount of hours later they finally arrived in a Florida airport, where they were immediately transported to a hotel near a nice, sunny beach.

"Wow, Ryuuzaki!" Misa exclaimed, looking out the hotel window with a happy expression on her face. She saw the beach, and how nice it looked.

Matsuda was also looking out the window, holding a similar expression like Misa.

Light sighed. He knew L wouldn't do this just out of the pure goodness of his heart. L was up to something, and it included going to the beach, in America. Why not just a beach in Japan?

The sleeping arrangements were simple. Matsuda and Ryuuzaki shared one room, and Misa and Light shared another. Alarm bells started ringing in Light's head. Weren't they supposed to be handcuffed? Shouldn't they share a room? Why was he stuck with Misa?

"Misa is your girlfriend, isn't she?" Ryuuzaki told Light when he questioned the arrangements. "And it would just be silly if we were handcuffed at a beach. People might think weird things."

It was weird Ryuuzaki used the "people think" card on Light, as it was usually _him_ that used it, not Ryuuzaki.

"Misa is not my girlfriend!" Light said, before he was dragged off by Misa to their new room, where there would be nice privacy from the 'pervert' Ryuuzaki.

Ryuuzaki turned around and simply smiled at Matsuda.

The next day, they were off to the beach. Light sighed. He was getting awfully suspicious of Ryuuzaki (as if he wasn't suspicious enough). L had made sure they all were wearing swim suits, when L himself didn't look like he was wearing anything at the beach other than his normal white shirt and blue jeans combo. Apparently Ryuuzaki had them at a private beach somewhere so no one else was around. Something he could've easily done in Japan.

Light guessed he voiced his opinion out loud, because Ryuuzaki turned to him and replied, "Don't you know the American holidays? It's the Fourth of July!"

"You took us here for an American HOLIDAY?"

Ryuuzaki smiled and nodded.

Light sighed. The only plus to this was Misa in a bikini. He quickly thought that over, and decided maybe that wasn't a plus. They were all dressed for the water except L.

"You forced us to a beach in Florida, and you aren't even wearing anything appropriate for the beach!"

"On the contrary Lighto-kun," Ryuuzaki said, and with a simple arm movement he pulled all his clothes off to reveal....

A Speedo. Not just any though, but they were American flag print. American Speedo.

How blinding it was for all two of them. Actually, that was only blinding just for Light. It was amazing how pale he seemed, but was actually lightly tanned. Light quickly erased those thoughts from his mind. Misa didn't really care that L just ripped his clothes off to reveal something so life-scarring, and Matsuda had looked everywhere except at L all day. Something must've happened the night before.

"So, let me get this straight," Light started slowly, making sure he had Ryuuzaki's attention. "You took us to a beach in Florida, on the Fourth of July, JUST to wear THAT?!"

"Nice deduction skills Lighto-kun, skills Kira might have,"

"KIRA HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!"

"Getting defensive, that's a 10 percent increase Lighto-kun."

Light started hitting his head with the umbrella.

That's when things started to get even weirder.

Misa dragged Matsuda into the water (surprisingly someone who wasn't Light) and they started splashing each other. Light was fine with just sitting under the shade of the umbrella. Ryuuzaki however...

"Let's play games," Ryuuzaki said, staring at Matsuda. Matsuda shivered and shook his head. Misa's vigorous nodding made the choice made however. Ryuuzaki went closer to them, and Matsuda took this to dive into the water and he never rose up again.

Light raised an eyebrow. What the hell did L do to Matsuda last night? Light then decided he didn't need to know, because the question itself was horrible enough. What Light didn't expect however was for Ryuuzaki to jump into the water and possibly swim after Matsuda, leaving Misa standing in the water utterly confused.

Light covered his eyes and started thinking about his happy place when Matsuda's trunks came floating up on the water.

----

2.

L smiled as he clicked the "Order" button.

"What did you buy Ryuuzaki?" a voice came from behind L, and he quickly covered the screen and closed the window.

"Oh, that is a secret Lighto-kun!"

That nickname. Light knew something wrong was going to happen. Again. Light knew geniuses were weird, but still. Light also knew Matsuda probably knew something.

A couple days later, Matsuda's face suddenly turned bright red, and he quickly stood up and threw Aizawa's stress ball at Ryuuzaki's head.

"Something wrong Matsuda-san?" Ryuuzaki asked calmly, as if a stress ball did not just bounce off his head.

"RYUUZAKI!"

"Yes?"

"YOU....YOU....EUGH!"

Weird. That was something Light normally did to Ryuuzaki. He must've sent something to Matsuda.

Light knew this wasn't actually related to whatever Ryuuzaki ordered a couple days ago, but he was probably just bored.

The package finally arrived. Light vaguely wondered if it was costume day again and he didn't get the memo, because everyone was wearing some sort of costume piece. He noted on his computer calendar that it was July Fourth. Then he realized it was meeting day, as everyone was getting up to go to the meeting room. Light sighed.

They sat at the meeting table, without something sitting at the head, namely L. He was missing, though that was no surprise. Suddenly, the door slammed open, and a person they almost didn't recognize came in. It would've worked, but the black rings around the eyes were not very hard to miss.

"Hello everyone. I'm going to start the meeting now," L said with out much emotion in his voice, the normal way he spoke. He was wearing a blond wig, glasses, and a bomber jacket. He had a milkshake in one hand, and a hamburger in the other. "Before I start, I'd like to say that today is Alfred's birthday and-- hmm mm mmhp phhm," the last part was hard to understand because he then took a bite of his hamburger and was trying to talk while chewing.

Light face palmed as L started waving an American flag in his now hamburger less hand while attempting to talk about Kira with milkshake and a straw in his mouth.

----

3.

Matsuda was sunbathing somewhere in California with his eyes closed behind his sunglasses, when he felt someone overshadowing him, blocking the sun. He opened his eyes and took of his sunglasses and looked up.

"Matsuda-san."

Matsuda raised an eyebrow. He went under a different name here in California. "Can I help you?" Matsuda asked.

"Yes, I'm wondering why you aren't in Japan helping with the Kira case,"

Matsuda sat up and looked at them. "Shouldn't you be dead?"

"Shouldn't you?"

"How would you know I'm dead?"

"How would _you_ know I'm dead?" he mimicked.

"You 'died' after immediately leaving the case, Matsuda-san. How would I not know? More importantly, how would you know I'm supposed to be dead if you died first?"

"The main question, Ryuuzaki-san, is why are you blonde and wearing glasses?"

"Why are you wearing the same thing?"

"I thought of being America first!"

"How do you know I didn't think of doing this first?"

"Because I died first!"

Someone ran by them shouting "Pastaaa!" while they stared at each other.

"Why don't you just wake up Matsuda-san?"

Matsuda sat up in bed wondering what kind of weird dream that was.

----

4.

Light, studying in America for a while, but on summer break, was invited to a party at the beach. More like, he was dragged to the party by his friends.

"Come on Light, it'll be fun!"

"And there are fireworks!"

Light was sitting there with a soda in one hand, watching everyone. It was getting pretty dark, and the excitement was growing in the air as the time to release the fireworks was coming closer and closer. He had fled from Japan and went under a different name, but his friends decided on giving him Light as a nickname. Oh, the irony. Ryuk had disappeared somewhere (probably off trying to steal caramel apples from someone), and Light didn't have anyone to talk to.

It was dark by now and the people who were throwing the party had stuck tiki torches into the ground and lit them, making their spot on the beach pretty lit up. Light finished talking to someone and told his friends he was going to walk around and look for a coffee place because it was getting pretty cold. He had found a coffee place, and after looking through the other shops, decided to go back to the party as it was getting time for the fireworks show.

"Fancy seeing you here, Light-kun."

Oh god. He didn't. Light turned around and almost dropped his coffee in shock. There was Ryuuzaki in all his glory, or not so glory as he was wearing some very patriotic clothes, and a fireworks hat.

"Didn't know you were very patriotic Ryuuzaki." Light said dryly, as it was the only thing he could think of saying.

"Here to see the fireworks, Light-kun?"

So he was avoiding the subject as much as Light wanted to. Good. Light's answer was to turn around and continue walking back to the party. Ryuuzaki grabbed his wrist.

"Would you kindly let go?" Light said, giving a small tug to see if Ryuuzaki would let go. He had a tight grip on Light's wrist.

Ryuuzaki had an odd expression on his face as he studied Light.

_Boom._ The first firework was shot into the air.

"Are you going to let go now?"

Ryuuzaki only fidgeted.

_Boom boom._

Light pulled weakly. This was starting to get awkward, and he really should get back to the party before his friends think he got kidnapped. This would probably happen if Ryuuzaki didn't let go.

Ryuuzaki pulled Light closer.

_Boom._

"W-what are you doing you crazy?" Light asked, but he said it weakly.

Ryuuzaki pushed their lips together.

'Oh.' That was the only thought Light had.

_Boom boom boom._


End file.
